Bottoms Up

By: LESTER TAGA CAPAS
 

He takes the bottle to his mouth and sits on his favorite wooden chair. "A beautiful antique, isn't it? All these years and this chair is as beautiful as ever." 

He puts the bottle down and gently touches the arm-rests. "The same can't be said for me can it old friend?" 

He pulls his pet dog gently towards him. "All time ever did was turn these old bones brittle." The dog licks his cheek and he smiles sadly. 

"To think , nearly 45 years ago I told my mother this would be a waste of money. They don't make chair like these anymore. Born from hard labor and skill."

" Mr. Carbonel..Mr. Carbonel? " Knocks on the door "Mr. Carbonel?". He stands up to check on who it is. "Hello Karen how are you?" 

"Mr. Carbonel, can we borrow your bike?" He taps her head gently, of course you can. Be careful." He waves her goodbye when the girl's mother scolds her from afar. 

"Return that.." Her daughter argues but returns it. "Mr. Carbonel please, stay away from my children." "But ..Elle.." Without even looking at him she turns away.

He walks towards his chair slowly with a heavy heart.

Looking up he prevents the tears from further coming out and sits down. He gulps down a large portion of the vodka in his bottle. "At least..I have you..." 

He looks at the bottle with a miserable grin. He finishes the contents and blacks out. He unconsciously falls to the floor crying and laughing at the same time. 

"I shouldn't have moved here, I should have just let them live their life without me. They would have been happier.." 

He falls asleep on the floor until the next morning when someone knocks at his door. The man finds the door unlocked  " Mr. Carbonel are you alright?" 

He helps him up "We saw you from the window..Mr. Carbonel.." 

He sees the blood on the floor. "Mr. Carbonel you're bleeding!!" They rushed him to the hospital. He was accidentaly stabbed by the knife in his pocket when he collapsed on the floor. 

The wound is fatal, penetrating his stomach and intestines. 

The doctor holds his hand as she prays, knowing it's only a matter of time. "My fault, it was all my fault.." He whispers. "You should never keep knives in your pocket." 

The doctor whispers back. " I should have never have left them back then, now, even my grandchildren don't know who I am.".

 He looks at the doctor " I thought I was doing the right thing by following my heart. I couldn't bear her constant nagging I was weak." He whispers angrily at himself and the woman he was forced to marry. 

"I should have never gotten her pregnant." He frowns.

"We had children, we had children but I chose the woman I truly loved. I thought I was right I was right wasn't I??" 

The doctor shakes her head "I don't know sir, It was your life and your decision, I can't judge." He looks at her " I thought I was right, I guess the blues got the best of me after all. I saved the best of me for someone who's love I couldn't have. 

Instead of giving the woman who loved me a chance. She wasn't always bad, It's my doing, I was the reason she became the cold-hearted nagger she was before she.." He coughs up blood. The doctor wipes his cheeks.

"Now, here I am dying with a complete stranger." The doctor looks him in the eyes. "Surely you must have done some things right in your life?" The doctor inquired. " Not that I can remember, all I did was sit Idly in that chair thinking of my mistakes never solving them. I'm going to die anyway. Please do me a favor doctor." 

He writes down a number on a sheet of paper. "Please tell my children that I'm sorry for taking their mother from them, It was the spur of the moment when she caught me with the .."

The doctor stands up. "I'll lend you a phone, you can use your dying breaths to apologize and say goodbye." " No! They might hang up if they recognize my voice, but for a stranger it would be easier." 

The doctor looks at him . "I am not a doctor nor am I a stranger, you have known me all your life." 

The old man is confused. " I was there whenever you beat your wife and kids, whenever you fell asleep in church, I was even there when you killed your wife. You had so many chances to atone for your sins but did not, all you did was reason your conscience away, you did me a favor." She laughs. 

The old man stares gasping for air. When suddenly his breathing stabilizes. The lady is gone and he touches the bed sides but they are red hot. 

Stung by the heat he recoils when the surroundings burst into flames and a voice is heard. "I have known you all your life, but now, you will know me, that I am real and that all sins must be paid by fire.." 

The old man sees a vision of him dying that afternoon, and screams...